Give me hope
by Azzyness
Summary: In New Moon, alice's pov Jazz is upset because he snapped at Bella. ive read billions of this type of thing, many better than mine, but i couldnt resist giving it a try myself.


**I dont own these charactors. this is my version of how Alice comforts jasper after he tries to *drink* bella in new moon. I have read better versions than mine, so I'm sure you have, but don't bee to harsh :) Reviews make me smile :p Oh and Alice's pov. :)

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I sent a quick apologetic smile to Bella, who was lying covered in blood, on our kitchen table. It's my fault, I thought, I should have seen this coming. Just one spec of blood, from one tiny paper cut. It was almost ironic that our own family had proved to be the greatest danger to her. When I left the room, going quickly through the door that lead to the yard, it hit me; the most dreadful sense of self hatred and depression. It spread through me like a poison, almost bringing me to my knees. I wanted to scream, if I felt like this, how did jasper feel? I couldn't even imagine the true toxicity of Jasper's feelings towards himself.

He was sitting on a boulder, close to our stream. Edward was standing a few feet anyway from him, glaring at him. _Edward leave him alone. He'll punish himself enough._ Edward looked up at me and nodded. He, Rosalie and Emmett made their way into the house, just above human pace. Rose gave me a sympathetic glace. They knew what I had to deal with; they could feel it too. As Edward entered the house, I had a vision..._Edward helps Bella into the car, a bandage the only reminder of this fateful day._

I walked up to Jazz; he wouldn't look at me. Although I knew he could hear me. I sat down slowly beside him. He carried on staring at the flowing water, the torturous emotions not letting up even for a second. I knew exactly what he was thinking, so I didn't need to ask. He was questioning himself, wondering if he deserved this life, our family and worst of all, if he deserved me. I knew he thought the answer was no, otherwise he'd have looked at me by was definitely the worst I'd seen him get. He truly believed he was a monster, a monster that didn't deserve to be loved. I tried my hardest to send comforting, yet hopeful emotions to him. A vision appeared before me, but I refuse to pay attention to it. I would let this play out itself so Jasper didn't feel my emotions being effected. He needed me more than the future did at the moment. He just sat there, staring. He still wouldn't even look at me, stubbornly refusing to let me pull him out of this misery. It irritated me and that's when his eyes touched mine; deep, dark pools of sorrow. I knew he would have felt my anger and came up with completely the wrong explanation for it. He no doubt thought I was angry with him because of what happened with Bella. I reached for his hand; he flinched as my skin came into contact with his. In that second I felt the extreme potency of his emotion, then suddenly it was gone.

All that was left was a deep loneliness in its place, that threatend to drown me. It took me a moment to realise this emotion was my own. Jasper wasn't there anymore, he'd run away from me. I sprinted as fast as I could following his scent, it didn't take me long to catch up to him. Although I could not see him I could hear him and smell his distinct smell, which I could and would follow to the end of the earth. I stopped abruptly, searching out where the choking, sobbing sounds were coming from. My poor jasper, so grown up and gentlemanly to others; was still very child like to me. I needed him though, as much, if not more than he needed me. I scaled the nearest tree and sure enough, he was on a branch just above me.

He was huddled up leaning against the trunk, sobbing into his knees. He seemed even paler than usual, probably from the effort of not crippling me with his emotions. So Jazz, even though he desperately needed help, he was still determined to protect those around him from his influence. I couldn't take it any longer; I encircled my arms around him like a cage, protecting him from the sharks. His feeble attempts to break my grasp made it obvious he was going to allow me to comfort him. Exhausted from torturing himself he gave in and collapsed into me. Allowing me to stoke his blonde hair, which was entangled with debris from the trees surrounding us, I comforted him.

"Shh," I cooed, stroking the wisps of golden hair away from his face. "Jasper, Bella's fine. She isn't even angry with you, its ok. Shh." He was still sobbing dryly, as he lifted his head to gaze into my golden eyes. "What did I ever do to deserve you, Alice Cullen?" he asked. This stunned me completely, I froze around him. I didn't have an answer; I thought he'd got the question backwards. I'd always thought of Jasper as a gift, from what ever God was out there to me. A gift I did not deserve, but appreciated all the same.

"You deserve me? It is me who does not deserve you jazz. You are caring and selfless," At this I felt him shake his head, but I continued anyway. "You are one of the most deserving people in the universe Jazz. No one deserves happiness as much as you do after trying so hard to be good, you deserve to be happy. Never forget that."

He sighed; he knew there was no point in arguing with me and turned away. Refusing to believe what was so obvious to me. I held his chin in my palm, forcing him to look at me. "Jasper Whitlock, are you calling me a liar?" A faint smile appeared on his face, although it didn't touch his eyes. I knew only now that he was going to be ok, but I couldn't help worrying. I scanned the future; my mind was blank. A decision that would affect us all was about to be the out come be good or bad I did not know...

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**I must admit, I loved writing that. Review me please!! (:  
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